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Alexandra Levit (QuickBase)
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Homepage: http://www.lifehack.org
Posts by Alexandra Levit (QuickBase)
Do You Unnecessarily Point Out Flaws?
Sep 1st
Ringlight: Beauty vs. Flaws from Auzigog on flickr
was at the pool recently with my son when a stranger tapped me on the shoulder. “Your bathing suit top is on backwards,” she said. Embarrassed, I hurried to the restroom and put the suit on correctly. Was I glad this woman I didn’t know pointed out my mistake? Not particularly. I was actually a tad annoyed because she’d made me feel insecure. And who did she think she was, anyway?
Then there’s the time that I sent out pre-printed holiday cards and a casual friend asked if I knew that there was a typo on the card. I didn’t understand his need to point this out – if I knew about the error, then surely I was already feeling badly about it. If I didn’t know, then his alerting me to the typo wasn’t going to change the fact that the cards already went out and there was nothing I could do about it.
If They Aren’t Close, Mind Your Own Business
I believe that the only people with whom you are entitled to proactively bring up mistakes or flaws are your immediate family members, your best friends, and your direct reports. Everyone can improve, this is true, but these are the individuals who will most appreciate and value your desire to help them in that capacity. These are the individuals who can have a sense of humor about minor criticisms and take them in the spirit in which they are offered.
At Work, Do You Say it with Tact or Not at All?
In work situations, you risk alienating colleagues and/or managers when you point out their mistakes or flaws. For example, suppose your office-mate stutters a lot in group meetings. Should you bring it up to him? In my opinion, the answer is no. He probably can’t control his stuttering, and as tactful as you think you’re being, you’ll probably still hurt his feelings. If his manager wants to address it, that’s her prerogative.
Don’t Be Mr. or Mrs. Fix It
It’s not your responsibility to ensure perfect conduct the part of your colleagues, so even if you have an obsessive attention to detail or feel morally outraged about an issue, let it go. Unless your action can keep a grievous mistake from occurring in the first place, it’s not worth the potential damage to your reputation.
I sense that some of you might find fault with this point of view. So let’s open the forum – what do you think?
Alexandra Levit is a career and workplace expert at the Intuit Quickbase Blog , a daily source for advice on how to be exceptional at your job. You can follow her on Twitter at @alevit.
When it Comes to Work Relationships, Let it Be
Aug 24th
Allow me to be straight about something. I have fought against certain professional relationships my entire life. Why? Because I’ve continually wished that some people were different, and I’ve been convinced that others were out to get me. I have turned away potentially fruitful relationships because I was afraid of getting hurt or I questioned a person’s motives. It’s a shame, and if I can, I’d like to prevent you all from doing the same. Here are some lessons I’ve now tried to incorporate:
Don’t Dwell on the Negative
If you like and respect a colleague, let it be. Look for the best in that person. Focus on the traits that prompted you to want to work with them in the first place. Remember that no one is perfect, and one person can be all things to all people. Accept the things you don’t like and don’t try to change them because that will only result in frustration and friction that could be perceptible to your team.
Maintain Trust
If you basically like and respect someone at work, believe that they mean well and will do right by you. Don’t over-analyze why they behave a certain way, and don’t assume the worst if something happens between the two of you that you don’t understand. Always address issues proactively through open communication, and don’t expect them to read your mind.
Cut Them Slack
If they make a mistake or a decision with which you don’t agree, forgive them. Trust that they will learn and do things differently next time. Beware of sky-high expectations. If you’re annoyed that they are not as talented or as articulate or as consistent as you are, recognize that they are probably better than you are in some ways so it evens out in the end.
Meet Face-to-Face
Go out of your way to spend quality time with the important people on your team, especially if you usually work virtually. Don’t rely on email or social media – it’s not the same as calling someone or seeing them in person. The more you’re in one another’s presence, the easier it will be to ensure you’re on the same page.
Examine Your Role
If you find yourself having the same problems with co-workers over and over again, the time has come to look at yourself and what you may be doing to cause roadblocks. Taking responsibility for your own behavior will open the door to improve your workplace relationships in immeasurable ways.
Alexandra Levit is a career and workplace expert at the Intuit Quickbase Blog , a daily source for advice on how to be exceptional at your job. You can follow her on Twitter at @alevit.